Distractions

To grieve is to have loved, how sad would it be to never have grieved. 

Those words spoke volumes to me this past week. Distraction is sometimes the best way to not necessarily deal with grief but help pass time which does help you deal with it. 

Dakota's spot in the living room lay bare. No dog bed, no Dakota. I asked Barb if we could move one of the other dog's beds over there, it just seemed too bare and as many husbands know, since Barb is in control of everything inside the house, I best ask permission before moving anything. 

As part of our distractions, we decided to get out of here for a few days. Part of it would be part of the grieving process; the rest would be true distractions.  We headed north to attend DeAnne's funeral. We did not make it far though, only to Rapid City where we spent the day shopping and visiting friends. In the shopping category I bought myself a cross bow. With this most recent injury I could not pull my bow back without pain and reinjuring myself. Plus the fact that I have been fighting pain for the past several years when I use it. It was time to try something new. 

From there we went to The Hairy Cow Brewery where we met our friends Doug and Lisa. While we text every few weeks, it has been almost a year since we have seen them and what better place than a brewery we where we wanted to try their food!

The beer was good, the company was better, the food...mah... okay. Even a little disappointing. With the brewery being a harvest host, we were able to spend the night right there in the parking lot. The following morning we carried on to North Dakota. We were taking our time, we did not want to get to the farm too early, they had a bunch of family there and did not need us there. Instead we stopped at Sheep Creek Recreation Area a couple of hours south of the farm. What a great spot! Free camping, with electric and water for up to 14 days!    

The funeral was bittersweet, DeAnne looked at peace. There were so many friends and family they filled the church, the loft, and even livestreamed it over to the Senior Center. 

The weather cooperated; overcast and cloudy with just enough rain for the occasion. I stole many of these pictures from one of DeAnne's daughters Facebook page. I am glad that she took a few pictures, while I thought about it, I didn't take any. 

They brought DeAnne's two VW bugs and her golf cart to the service and the school even donated a bus to transport the family from the church to the cemetery. Everyone was encouraged to wear pink. Four of the grandchildren got up and did readings. The entire service was very touching and plenty of tears were shed. DeAnne was baptized and married in this church. 

We left early the following morning and headed east to Dino and Lisa's house! Just a one-night stay but we made the most of it! We had lunch at their place then jumped into truck and went on an adventure. 

Our first stop? A brewery of course!

We then went on a troll hunt! This area has a series of trolls throughout the area. Each has its own story as well as clues to where you can find the next troll. We only had time for two, it will give us a reason to come back again!

It was a great day and the perfect distraction. We always have fun together. After breakfast the next morning we were off! 4 hours later we pulled up to a friend of Barb's in New Richmond Wisconsin. Melanie lost her husband a couple of months ago and we were not able to make it to his celebration of life. It was great to spend a couple of hours with her. 

That evening we stopped at our niece Katie's place who lives less than 5 miles from Melanie. They took us out to supper at 45th Parallel Distillery for a couple of pizzas and then next door to a brewery. We spent the night in their driveway. They had both left for work by the time we woke up the next morning. Of course, I forgot to take pictures at either of these events.

Then it off to my sister Judy's house in Balsam Lake where the whirlwind of activity continued. They have an absolutely beautiful place on the lake, and the leave were changing adding to its beauty. 

 We used to live in this area as well and have several favorite places we like to go. One of our mainstays was The Thirsty Otter, and it was Thursday and that only means one thing; All you can eat rib night! We were joined by another niece Kris who drove over from Minnesota to see us. 

For those of you who noticed the weird angle of my arm, that is not actually my arm. Brother-in-law Mike was playing prankster behind us. Another thing we miss about this area is the bars. There is nothing quite like a northern Wisconsin bar where you know no one yet know everyone at the same time. Wise Guys in Milltown is just such a place. Of course, it helps that our favorite bartender of all time works there! Jules always has a smile on her face and is such a good person. 

I took several random pictures of the bar to capture its essence.....

No stop at a Wisconsin bar is complete without doing shake-a-day!

Friday was golf day! Several months ago sister Judy had called and asked if I wanted to join them for my dad's memorial golf outing. My dad used to gold the Spooner Golf Course several times a week and as a youngster we each joined him on many occasions. In addition to Mike and Judy, we were joined by my brother Bob, sister Becky and her husband Murray. 

Neither Barb or I are golfers, and I did not do my shoulder any favors, but in honor of my dad golf I did. And not well. 

Last year, they had spread some of my dad's ashes on the course. It is nice knowing that part of him is now part of the course. 

Saturday, we trekked over to Somerset to spend the day with our good friends Doug and Connie. We spent the day sighting in the new crossbow, exploring their property and just catching up. 

Sunday, our last day in the area was the reason we came out here in the first place. The wedding of my brother Rod's stepdaughter! The irony of the week was not lost on me. The ending of one life and the beginning of something new. This is the first time that our entire family has gotten together in several years. 

This first picture is of Brother Bob, Greta, Mike and Barb.

Sister Carol, Sister Becky, Brother Rod and Sister Judy. I have always called them "Brother/Sister" like that, not sure why, I just do. 

Never in my life have I seen a groom so emotional over getting married. It started with a quiver of a lip as he waited for his bride to be to walk down the aisle. Soon, it was full out sobbing. He held it together for most of the actual ceremony. Very, very touching. 

They asked us not to take pictures during the ceremony, but here are a couple from the reception.

Bride Rachel and groom Noah

Brother Rod and Rachel

The next morning we were homeward bound! But not before stopping to see another couple friend Tom and Shelly along the way. Tom and I have been friends for over 40 years and do not get to see each other very often. Of course, no pictures. 

How are the dogs doing? Great! This was Masie's first travel adventure and we could not be happier with how she did. She threw up between our house and Rapid City during the first hour, but after that no more sickness. They just laid on Barb's lap most of the day and slept. 

Now we are home. It seemed like a month ago that we left, but it was really only 11 days. Keeping busy and the distractions were just what we needed to keep our minds occupied. The house is a bit emptier; I still look in the corner for Dakota and still look for her in front of the bookcase in the bedroom. While her body is not there, I like to think her soul still is staring at us while we go about our day(s).