Saturday, April 6th was my dad's birthday. He would have been 98. Gone now 24 years. My mom, gone 19 years, would have been 96. Barb's parents, whose mom and dad would have both been 86, gone 47 years and 12 years respectively.
They have been gone so long that it is hard to wrap our heads around the fact that in a perfectly healthy world all of them could still be around. What would that have been like? How different would our lives be if they were still alive? A lot, to be honest.
Although Barb and I had great jobs, it was inheritance from my dad that pushed us over the edge that allowed us to retire early and live on the road all those years. The inheritance from Barb's dad helped us build this house.
That led me to the question; how long do you want to live? For me, the answer is easy. I want to live as long as I can with Barb as long as I am happy and healthy. I do not want to live a day without Barb, nor do I want her to live a day without me. Nor do we want to be a burden on our children. Early to mid 80's would be a great run, although I have a feeling, the older I get the more that number is likely to change.
These are the random thoughts that went through my head this week as I mentally wished my dad a happy birthday.
This week was a pretty slow and quiet week for us. We started out the week (actually ended last week) by driving up to our niece and nephew-in-law Alana and Ryan's, house up in Spearfish to celebrate Easter. We brought the girls so they could have a play date. More for Zoey than Dakota, as Dakota hates going to other people's houses where she is not comfortable with their floors. As Ryan put it; "Our floors are lava to Dakota". He was nice enough to put down a blanket for Dakota to lay on, but she opted for Loki's kennel as her "safe space" during the visit.
The other three dogs had a chaotic day. Have you ever tried to take pictures of three dogs that would not stop moving? Impossible, I tell you! Loki had recently had surgery and had a cast on her leg, but it did not slow her down at all!
After an hour or two, they tuckered out and I was able to get a few pictures of the girls while they were resting.
We got out twice on two shed hunts. The first adventure we stayed in the lowlands. An open grassy area, a game production area where we know the elk hang out. A pretty area, but the only thing of interest we found was this cow elk carcass. A beautiful day, a great hike, but no antlers. Our goal is just to find one elk shed a year, sometimes that is achievable, other years, not so much.
Getting skunked down low, we decided to hit the hills for our next adventure. When we drove up to the parking spot. I pointed to the top of the mountain and told Barb, "We are going up there". Her reaction was "Yeah, right". Little did she know, I was serious!
Starting on an overgrown logging road, away we went! Elk sign was sparce down low as we worked out way up, but the higher we got the more elk sign we saw.
Here is the thing about shed hunting, you should not walk next to your partner, you should be at least 30 yards apart, so you are covering different ground. We kept in sight of each other for the most part and whistled to each other every minute or so when we were out of sight of each other.
We left the logging road and started billygoating our way to the top. At over 5,000' you can feel it when you start exerting yourself. There were several points where I would pick out a tree about 10 -20 yards up hill from me and set that as a goal before I rested again. Sometimes I made it to my goal, other times not quite. The bright side of stopping to catch your breath is that you can admire the views!
We made it to the top at different places at different times and eventually met up at the highest point which was 5,555'. These pictures just do not do it justice. As beautiful as these pictures are, in person, it is twice as beautiful.
We got together with Dan, Bonnie, Kevin and Cheryl three times during the week. Once for supper at Kevin and Cheryl's, and twice at the Pringle Bar for supper. The last night was more or less a goodbye party for me. No, I am not dying yet, but I am headed north for a few weeks. It is planting time in North Dakota!
I think we all want to live as long as we can in reasonable health. Who knows how long that will be? Your story about stopping to rest and see the scenery, reminded me of a similar time. We were living in New Orleans, at sea level, and had desk jobs all day. We went to Guatemala to visit my husband's relatives, and one day decided to climb a volcano. Well, it was high elevations, not to mention, my desk-job fitness, so I was easily winded. As the our guide scampered up the mountain, I stopped often to "take pictures". I took more pictures on that climb than during the rest of the trip.
ReplyDeleteThat's funny! Even funnier because I took the pictures off both mine and Barb's phones. I only used about half of what she actually had on there!
DeleteInteresting thoughts about age and aging. My parents made it to 84 for Dad, 77 for Mom. Both died of heart issues. My one granny lived to be 99, the other to 84, but I lost both grandfathers, 30 years apart, in traffic accidents. I used to think 84 for a good age to live to, now I am thinking 90 is better, lol! I did wonder what kind of jobs you had that allowed you to travel so much and retire so early. Nice to have had that kind of remembrance from your family. It doesn't replace them, of course, but still a nice thing for you both. Diving my parents' legacy 13 ways didn't leave a lot to any one of us, lol.
ReplyDeleteLoved the dogs with rabbit ears, how funny that must have been! And where are those mountains? They look stunning.
That particular mountain, hill, or whatever you call it, is about 20 minutes from our place. I wonder why they didn't name this area The Black Mountains instead of The Black Hills.
DeleteI had to look up the difference between a hill and a mountain. This is what I found:
A hill is a smaller landform than a mountain. It is usually classified as a rounded, elevated feature that stands above the surrounding terrain. A mountain, on the other hand, is a large landform that is typically higher and more steep than a hill.
The shed count seems to even out.
ReplyDeleteWhen we start gasping for air while walking, we only look at our waists to see why.
I remember waiting for my daughter to catch up years ago. (Elevator was out. Our room was on the 21st floor.)
Be Safe and Enjoy the planting season.
It's about time.
Ain't that the truth! We just take it slow and easy; we know we can still make it up, it just takes longer!
DeleteI have heard of shed hunting, but not many folks do this in our area. Neat pictures and the babies are adorable in their bunny ears. I know you all live a very fun life with all the traveling. FUN! We only have my husband's dad that is still living and he is 95. Sam and I talked about this very thing yesterday. His dad is soooo lonely and really needs to be in assisted living care, but absolutely refuses. I feel so bad for him. Not sure that this is what I want to do....95 and lonely. We go twice a day to take care of him, but still he is lonely...
ReplyDeleteThat does have to be hard for him....and you guys. I would have a hard time going into assisted living as well. Such a hard time of life.
DeleteMy late mom was born Apr. 4th, and would have been 99!
ReplyDeleteI have such fun looking for deer sheds! I had a buck drop his while I watched, right outside my kitchen window! I was thrilled!
Lovely country around you.
How did I miss that post!?!? That is a sighting of a lifetime, and he is going to be an absolute beast next year.
DeleteWhat you said about living with Barb I get as I feel the same way about Tim, al that snow makes it look cold. Beautiful photos, won't see me walking up a mountain just not going to happen
ReplyDeleteWe are going to walk up mountains until.... until we can't I guess. Then we will just relive our memories of a time that was.
DeleteI can totally relate my husband and I always worked, no children my parents passed on young but once married we never had close family ties-sadly.
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I have been together almost 45 years now-him being so ill, a scary thought to be all alone My sister passed from a car accident soon after graduating top of her class-drunk driver her birthday was on the 6th my late Mom's birthday was on the 10th so I have been thinking of them this week more
45 years, I am impressed! We are at 38, hoping to get to 50+. Mother Nature and God will decide for us.
Deleteyes
DeleteAnother great adventure and family too. Such a great bonus! The hike was demanding! Well done.
ReplyDeleteLove the pups in the rabbit ears…ah ear!
We had to push ourselves that last 100 yards, but it was worth it!
DeletePuppies and bunny ears stole the show. I love all the pups, but Dakota sure has my heart! And what a beautiful part of our great country you chose to live in…we enjoyed our time in your area during the travel days. I think the cow carcass more than makes up for no antlers!
ReplyDeleteThe cow elk carcass was something to admire. You could not help but stare at it and wonder how it died. Did a mountain lion take it down? Disease? And how many animals, birds and insects fed on her after she was gone.
DeleteI want to die as my paternal grandparents did--in their sleep, Grandma at 79, Grandpa at 83. They died six months apart after 61 years of marriage! My Dad was young when he left us 22 years ago at 72, my Mom is still living at 87, lives alone but has family stopping by all the time. Mike's Dad was 96 and was totally with it until about 2 weeks before he died. But he told us when he turned 90, "this being 90 is for the birds, I hurt all over and all my friends are dead!." And like you and Barb, I don't want to live even an hour without Michael and he feels the same way. Enjoy your time in North Dakota!
ReplyDeleteThat would be ideal. And I would be okay with those ages as long as either of us had to live without the other. That is probably the biggest concern in my mind. I never want to live without her, and I would not want her to go through the pain of me going first.
DeleteIs there a 'season' when permits are issued to collect sheds? Just read a Joe Picket novel that mentioned shed hunting out of season :) Beautiful pics of your time with the family and furry friends! But snow on Easter? Who'd a thunk!
ReplyDeleteI have been to states where you have to take an on-line class or where shed hunting is prohibited during certain times of the year. This is especially true where elk tend to congregate in wintering habitat or during birthing season. They do not want people in there disturbing them during those times. South Dakota is open all year round, no permits or certifications needed.
DeleteYour shed walk had some beautiful views! My parents both lived until their mid 90's it was a struggle for both of them Dad with Alzheimers and Mom with pain, so in their 90's they were both miserable. Yes I am lucky to have them for so long, but watching them slip away was no fun either.
ReplyDeleteI do not know which would be worse, pain or Alzheimer's. I have seen both and neither look good. Both are hard on the individual as well as their loved ones.
DeleteYou two are definitely soul mates thru and thru! In the coming year I’ll be the same age as my mom when she passed away at 69. When I was a kid I used to think my dad was old at 30. We also don’t want to be a burden to our kids. I always joke with my son Rob that he would probably just load me bum up in the back of his pickup and take me thru a car wash.😳 Would it be legal in your area to use a drone to assist in finding your prize shed? Cheers! 🍻
ReplyDeleteIsn't it funny how your perspective on age changes over the years. I was 12 when my parents for divorced, they had been married like 25 years and were in their 50's at the time and I remember thinking. "Why not just stick it out, you only have a few years left anyway". Now, 50 seems young with years of life ahead of you!
DeleteMy dad was 94 when he died (car crash) and my mom was a month shy of 91. Dad's mother was 104. I know I definitely don't want to live to be 104 unless I still had my marbles. Both my folks still did. But his mother went really downhill in her late 90s. I just turned 93--so probably not too much over 20 more years for me would be fine. But any time I am meant to go, I am ready. I thought it was my time recently, as you know. But not yet. I have always thought you should live each day like it is your last. One day it will be. I'm okay with that. :)
ReplyDeleteThose views up there are just stunning! Soon you'll be off planting again. Enjoy it all!! :) :)
If I knew you are 93, I had forgotten. I do know that you have had your fair share of challenges and that you are a fighter! Love your adage of living every day like it is your last.
DeleteThose were some beautiful "resting" views. The bunny ears were a cute idea in theory...lol I do think Dakota with only one ear is the cutest. Very pretty young girls.
ReplyDeleteIt is always a "surprise" to me to realize how long our parents have been gone because some days it seems like just a bit ago and other times it seems like forever.
That one ear is a classic! It was almost like she was flipping off the camera with a bunny ear. It took me a couple of years before the thoughts of calling my parents to "catch up" stopped floating into my head.
DeleteBoth of my Dad's parents died in their 60's, Mom's dad died when she was a teenager, but her mom lived to be 89 (I think)...yet both of my parents lived into their 90's with Mom turning 94 in 16 days. I'm like, do I really want to live THAT long? But at least I am thinking I will be able to walk at that age if I reach it, but a few months ago my knees hurt so much I would not have counted on that. Magic of medicine.
ReplyDeleteI bet having a parent live that long does change your perspective on how long you would want to live. Barb's grandmother lived well into her 90's, was sharp and active until the day she fell and passed away, while others seem to deteriorate while in their 70's.
DeleteWonderful to see and read about your Easter and climbing, you both did well, and that view does look amazing. I do know what you mean when saying it's better in person.
ReplyDeleteMy dad was 90 when he expired 10 years ago, mum expired in 2008 - still think of them and of course miss them.
Take care.
Do you think someday they will create a camera to capture something just as you see it?
Delete90 is a hell of a run. So many people are happy and very functional well into their 90's. I would be okay with that.
Hello,
ReplyDeleteI love your cute furbabies, they look adorable with the bunny ears.
Beautiful views and scenery from your walk, I feel like we would live longer as long as we keep getting out there on those walks. Take care, have a great day and happy new week!
That is one of the driving factors in us getting out there and hiking. It is easy, and frankly appealing, to sit on the couch, but once we get out there and start hiking we truly enjoy it.
DeleteIt’s nice that you don’t to live a single day without Barb, but a little worrisome YOU don’t want her to live a single day without you! She may have different ideas. Lol.
ReplyDeleteCute pic of the dogs with the ears. Dakota’s one ear made me chuckle, she seems so laid back, almost saying, ‘ yeah, yeah, get on with it, snap the damn picture so I can get these things off. Really is it necessary to embarrass me like this?” Lol.
My dad’s mom died at 47, his dad at 72, I didn’t know my other grandfather, but my mom’s mom died at 96. My mother died at 62, and my dad still does amazing things at 87 but is lonely, most of his friends have passed. My husband died at 55, his parents died in their mid 90’s. Life is a precious thing, but quality matters more than quantity. I want to live as long as I’m enjoying my life, when it or I become a chore or burden, when I can no longer see and experience the good things in life, my time will hopefully be quickly and painlessly complete and I will return to Mother Earth in peace.
Deb
She may very well feel differently. I just think of the pain I would feel and do not want her to go through that.
DeleteI think you nailed Dakota's thoughts. That dog will let us do anything to her while she just sits there and takes it.
I totally agree with you on the quality vs quantity. I have been relatively healthy my entire life, never experiencing constant pain like many others do. The few times I did, it sucked.
Too bad my ex husband didn't have the same thoughts! At least that's something I don't have to think about. Now the DOGS .... it's a dog's life ... and mine doesn't like slippery floors either. I have rugs EVERYWHERE!
ReplyDeleteDakota panics on any slippery surface. The only thing she is good with inside is plain concrete and carpet. Which is why we have two large dog beds in the living room and a carpet path from there to the kitchen.
DeleteOh, I forgot to mention something that I thought when I first read your comment but had forgotten by the time I responded.
Delete"Men suck, plain and simple". She women too, but almost all men.
winnie the pooh said "if you live to be 100, i want to live to be 100 minus one day so i never have to live without you"...i always tell my husband that, he feels the same way!! we have been so sick recently, we were laying in bed, we actually thought we were dying and we were kind of happy, it was just the way we wanted to go. except, we survived!! awesome pictures, barb is very lucky to have you!!
ReplyDeleteI had never heard of that statement from Pooh, but it is right on the mark! Who'da thought that we'd be using Pooh as a role model for life?!?
DeleteYou got that last statement wrong though, it is the other way around.
Love the labs in the crate together....I wonder who was first and who squeezed in!
ReplyDeleteI hear what you're saying about life without our beloved partners....I agree with you totally. Now we just have to figure out how to implement that!
Dakota was in the crate first, then Loki squeezed in later. I was actually quite shocked that Dakota did not bolt from the crate when Loki got in as she generally does not like being close to other dogs like that.
DeleteWOW! Those views are spectacular!
ReplyDeleteBravo for making it to the top.That's quite a hike for anyone.
Hiking like that, although painful, is also rewarding. Great to hear from you!
DeleteSuperb landscapes Jim and Barb, your little girds, they are gorgeous.
ReplyDeleteThey are cuties, aren't they?!?!?!
DeleteMy parents have been gone for a similar time. I find that in some ways, at my age, it just feels like I have seen them for a few weeks. Meanwhile, I want to live for another year, and I hope to say that again next year.
ReplyDeleteThere are times that I feel like both my parents are still out there living their lives and I just have not talked to them in a while.
DeleteHello Jim and Barb. :=)
ReplyDeleteWalking in the fresh air is a large step towards being healthy and living longer. Today the 10th of April is the date of my husband demise, He was 88, and if he hadn't fallen would be 91 today. We often said that we couldn't live without each other but I have, and happy memories are what keep me going. We were happily married for 63 years, not too bad, in the world we live in. Love all the photos you took of the landscape at the summit of the mountain. and I hope you two have a long and healthy life together to share all the things you love doing. The dogs look so cute with the bunny ears.
All the best
Sonjia.
Not bad?!? 63 years is incredible. We are at 38 years, 63 seems out of reach, but I guess it is very achievable in a perfectly healthy world.
DeleteA little late but Happy Birthday to your Dad! Mine would have been 108 years old and it’s hard to wrap my head around that but the older I get the memories start flowing. My mother was born in 1920. They passed within a year of each other. I’m glad we are in a world where medical breakthroughs have extended people’s lives. It’s lovely that both your dads inheritances was the catalyst for you retiring early, enjoying your lives on the road and living in that beautiful house. How long would I like to live? You gave all the reasons I want to stick around and reasons why I wouldn’t. Sounds like you’ve had a real nice week. I enjoyed reading about it and seeing all your photos. Those cute dogs made me smile. The escapades around the rabbit ears sure did make me smile. A fun read and a great post!
ReplyDeleteHealthy and happy? I'd take mid-80's in a heartbeat. No one in three generations on my dad's side has seen 80 so that should be my realistic goal. 1920.... I think back to that generation and think about everything they saw invented and change. Our kids will think the same of us. When we were younger, there were no cell phones, no computers and no internet at all!
DeleteThe dogs look cute in their rabbit ears. Looks like you got some snow too! I love it when it comes to us here in northern California. Special thoughts mentioned about your mom and dad. I lost both of my parents, and was only 28 when my dad died, and my mom lived until her 80's, so she had a long life. That's great that you hiked to the top! That's a high elevation.
ReplyDeleteHave a terrific week.
~Sheri
Northern California, one of the most spectacular places in the country. We love the Jedadiah State Park area and all those lovely redwoods!
DeleteWe’ve only ever found 1 shed on our ranch. Mid 80’s sounds like a good goal. Now in our 60s it seems to be coming so fast!
ReplyDeleteDoesn't it? We used to think 60 was soooo old when we were in our teens, now it is here!
DeleteYep. The older we get the older we want to be.
ReplyDeleteThe nice thing about hunting trips is you get to bring back memories even if you didn't get any antlers.
Those views from the high ground are really spectacular.
You are correct. Finding something is just icing on the cake!
DeleteA for effort on the doggy Easter pics - the single remaining ear is hysterical :-) Your mountains are so beautiful - from the top and on the way up there! No matter their age and size, our littles are still our babies.
ReplyDeleteWell, that may be the first "A" I've ever gotten!
DeleteWhat a great post! Rick and I have been having those same kinds of thoughts and discussions about aging. (Reading the excellent "Being Mortal" doesn't help!) I loved it all but had to laugh most at the dog portraits! Having tried reindeer ears on the cat, I can only imagine trying to go for four creatures!
ReplyDeleteOkay, I will make sure not to read that book. I would rather be oblivious and happy.
DeleteI'm a little behind to say the least. But LOVED all the dog photos, especially sweetheart Dakota. Such a cutie:) Good luck in ND!! Don't break anything!! Haha!
ReplyDeleteI miss my girls already, I wish they could come up and visit. But there is not a lot to do, so I understand.
DeleteMy next door neighbor is a widowed 93 yr old in a lot of pain from spinal stenosis-type issues. I definitely don't envy her at all. I'm more about quality over duration. Your area (Black Hills) is really pretty. We watched an episode of America's Backyard Gold set in SD and were impressed with how the countryside looked. Have to get there someday.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely quality over quantity... If you do ever make it up this way, you have a place to stay!
DeleteAnother fascinating post but as I am not in the least outdoorsy, I will concentrate on your remarks at the beginning. I too think all the time of how old my parents would be if only, et cetera. My father died one month shy of his 38th birthday, in a plane crash. I never knew him as he split with my mom when I was two. He would turn 94 this October had he lived, and I and my sister and half-sister and half-brother (we all have the same father and none of us remember him, as my half-bro and sis were very small when he died), had had him in our lives, we wonder the usual things -- would he have been proud of us, would he have enjoyed his grandchildren, stuff like that. We will never know. It's fortunate that my mother lived to age 83 and TG's dad and mom lived to be age 85 and 90, respectively. My mom left us in October of 2020; TG's dad passed away in January of 2011 and his mother in March of 2016. What wonderful loving grandparents they were! And they were a great influence on us all, and on our children, who still talk about them frequently, and remember aloud things they used to say and do. In other news, I am still taken aback by all that snow, hahaha! Although we sojourned briefly in California and Washington State when I was a kid, it's been sixty-plus years since I have spent much time west of the Mississippi River! Stay warm and tell the doggos I said that everything will be all right. My Rizzo hates our new floors too, haha! xoxo
ReplyDeleteOh and I meant to say that I have many times said, I want to be the first to go! I don't think I can live a day without my TG. I sure don't want to. He will be fine without me as long as there are golf courses open and Chicago Cubs games on TV, and he can make toast! hahahaha! xoxo
ReplyDelete